Tag: Bad Film

Tanner Reviews X-Men: Apocalypse

X-Men_-_ApocalypseI have been seeing an unreasonable amount of superhero movies this year. I should go watch something else, anything else just to break the pattern… But at either rate, I still saw it so now it is time to talk about it. This is going to be a rather long review after I went through the preliminaries of all the things that I wanted to discuss. But what all of this ultimately boils down to is the fact that this movie is probably one of the most painfully average movies that I have seen in a long time. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews X-Men: Apocalypse”

Tanner Reviews The Fantastic Four (2015 Film)

Fantastic_Four_2015_posterSo… Today I went to the superhero film that everyone thought was going to be bad… And it was. At least some things remain consistent. It is no secret that August is a desolate waste land when it comes to movies. Like the barren ‘Post Oscar Season’ that is January, August is that month where the Summer Blockbusters that were not going to be any good go to die. One of the main reasons that I am reserving judgment on The Suicide Squad, but that is a story for this time next year. Back to the topic at hand. I knew, going into The Fantastic Four that it was going to be bad, I think everyone knew that this movie was going to be bad, it had all the warning signs of a poorly created Hollywood reboot and retooling. It featured dark tones, seemed needlessly realistic, and was just an all around poor film. I can tear this piece of shit apart for days… And I think I shall. Let’s tear into the terribly grim movie that is The Fantastic Four. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews The Fantastic Four (2015 Film)”

Tanner Reviews Twister

TwistermovieposterI think it is high time that I discuss ‘guilty pleasures’. Ah yes, we all have them. We all have that film or video game or TV show or whatever the hell it is that we KNOW damn well that it is terrible… And yet we can’t help but enjoy the living hell out of it. The acting is wrong, the setting is wrong, the controls are wrong, just about everything about the thing is wrong, and yet it is still something that whenever you are bored one day you can watch over and over again and never get sick of it. If you enjoy any kind of visual media and if you are reading this I am sure that you do then you have a guilty pleasure and let me assure you that there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Even the pickiest of people have them and if a person says that they do not… Odds are very likely that they are either ashamed of their guilty pleasure or are so pretentious that they have their head stuck up their ass. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews Twister”

Tanner Reviews The Great Gatsby

TheGreatGatsby2012PosterWell hello Ole Spor’! I just popped down to my local theater to see one of our greatest US tales told through the eyes of director Baz Luhrmann… And wow wasn’t this a beautifully polished turd.

I suppose it is what I was expecting from Luhrmann. Make no mistake, I am not a fan of his films. He is a decent theater director and definitely had a theater eye for cinema. Everything seems pretty, everything seems polished, and stylized. But my God there is just not enough there besides the visuals to go on. His best film by far was Romeo + Juliet and that is mainly because Shakespeare’s writing was there for substance, not his. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews The Great Gatsby”