Tag: Stupid Movie

Mini Review: The Bye Bye Man

The_Bye_Bye_Man_posterYou know, I still do film reviews on this site. It has been a mixed bag of a year considering that I have been putting a lot of my attention on my academics and the new video series Crit or Miss (WHICH YOU SHOULD TOTALLY GO TO YOUTUBE TO SUBSCRIBE TO AND WATCH ALL THE VIDEOS!!!!!!). But I am still here to review some movies. Tragically I haven’t had much of a shot to get to the movies so the reviews have been lacking a little. But fear not! I will be returning to the big screen soon! But for now, let’s check out one that I had to watch on my tiny ass flat screen, The Bye Bye Man. Boy… Was this one an absolute pain in my ass… Continue reading “Mini Review: The Bye Bye Man”

Mini Review: The Forest

The_Forest_PosterFor the love of all that is good and holy, this year has been absolute hell when it comes to movies. Out of the movies, I have seen I have one ONE MOVIE on the “Best List” right now and that is Deadpool. My worst list has already filled up at this point! I have a fucking dishonorable mention! My god, I need to see some good movies this year. Something, anything! Why didn’t I see Zootopia? I hear that was a good movie! Why couldn’t I have found that on a fucking stream!? NO! Instead, I find The Forest! My god, I had to stumble across this piece of dog shit and now have to take soap to my eyes just to wash the images out of them. Continue reading “Mini Review: The Forest”

Tanner Reviews War Room

WarRoomMoviePosterA string of movies that have avoided my eye in recent years has been the wave of Christian movies that have been coming out since 2013. Typically speaking, I avoid these movies due to the fact that I hate preachy holier than thou stories that are made only for people within the Christian community to cheer while everyone else just scratches their heads. This wave of movies from people like the Kendrick Brothers and movies produced by Pure Flix are straw man movies through and through. They are not meant to tell a compelling story or even to paint Christianity in a humanizing or desirable light. They are movies that simply state that Christianity is great, everything else is evil, and here is our proof as to why this is the case. So naturally, those who associate themselves within these communities eat it up while the rest of us just pass on them as being movies that simply are not made for us. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews War Room”

Tanner Reviews Jem and the Holograms

Jem_Movie_Teaser_PosterAnyone who was a kid during the mid 80’s and early 90’s will remember the Saturday Morning Cartoons. They were the celebration of every kids day. We all had our favorites: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, He Man, GI Joe: The Great American Hero, and of course my favorite Transformers. I was born at the tail end of the 80’s so most of these TV Shows I watched thanks to some friends of mine who would lend me their VHS tapes. But man, I loved everything about that 80’s animation style and all the coolness that came with it as they tried to sell me shit. I have written copious amounts of reviews and lists in the past about this subject, so I think it is a foregone conclusion on how I feel about these lovely pieces of animated 80’s cheese.

One continued pattern of these TV shows, though, is the fact that they were all geared towards boys. Welcome to the 80’s, when gender roles were still running rampant all over the place! But either way, someone saw all of the merch that these guys were ringing in and said ‘we need something that appeals to girls too!’ So in the consumerist world that we live in, Jem and the Holograms was born!  Continue reading “Tanner Reviews Jem and the Holograms”

Tanner Reviews The Gallows

The_Gallows_Poster2015 has proven to be the year where I am continuously proven wrong about my pick for worst movie of the year. Over the past two years I have been running this site, I have typically had an easy winner for Worst Movie of the Year. It is rather cut and dry, or at worst, with two front-runners. This year though, I have a plethora of bad movies that have been festering in my mind. My readers, I’m sure, feel lucky to see me punished so that you all can be spared. But as for me, I feel like I need to take a shower in rubbing alcohol just to wash the shame out of my brain. The recent movie that I was “fortunate” enough to see was a lovely little horror movie called The Gallows. So now I have another shitty horror movie to contend with Unfriended on absolutely horrendous horror crap that are rots in my brain cavity instead of something constructive or helpful to my life.

Why do these movies make money? Why do people keep seeing this shit? These high school, everyone is a douchebag, nobody is redeemable, horror movies are garbage, and they somehow make money! Plus, to add the little cherry on top of the shit cake, the movie is a found footage movie. The shit keeps piling on! Oh what a lucky day for me. Continue reading “Tanner Reviews The Gallows”

Cheesy Romance Month: Just Go With It

Just_Go_with_It_PosterSo we come to an end of Cheesy Romance Month. We have looked at our cheesy romances through the ages. We took a trip back to the 80’s with John Hughes’ Sixteen Candleswe went to the 90’s and witnessed the tandem of Nora Ephron and Meg Ryan’s rom com magic in You’ve Got Mailand last week we took at look at the early 2000’s and Matthew McConaughey’s patented movie poster power lean with How to Lose a Guy in 10 DaysSo now it is only fitting that we look to the future! We are only now reaching the halfway mark of the 2010’s and it is hard to see where the trends are going to go. What will future decades think of when they look back at 2010’s rom coms? Will we as a society look back at the 2010’s and have fond memories of Rom Com’s the likes of Silver Lining’s Playbook or will we look back on the 2010’s with the disdain and disgust of another Happy Madison abomination squeezed out of Adam Sandler’s ass cheeks, Just Go With It. Based on the movie that gave Goldie Hawn her only Academy Award Cactus Flower, the movie featuring Jennifer Aniston and Sandler is an example of just how bad a cheesy romantic comedy can actually go. Continue reading “Cheesy Romance Month: Just Go With It”